we meet. you are nice and kind.

i put your oxygen mask on before mine.

i just met you, but i love you.

give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give.

it is subconscious.

it is automatic.

i do not know who i am anymore.

give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give. give.

oh no.

there is rough seas ahead.

conflict: it happens. normal life stuff.

turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence. turbulence.

I jump to conclusions and realize the inequalities i created, but seeing them from on the triangle: victim, rescuer, persecutor.

oh boy… the tears. the weaponized tears. i scream for you to see me. DON’T YOU LOVE ME LIKE I LOVE YOU?

i have made it where only you can save me. i made myself FOR YOU.

tread carefully, because if you do not read my mind perfectly and execute with a surgeon’s precision, i might end my life.

resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent. resent.

i am suddenly the nine year old girl again. under the bed. petrified.

whatever we could have, it has been destroyed.

the ones who stay are trash. like g.

rinse. cycle. repeat. 

no more.

no more.

NO MORE. 

xoxo,

your author